This Fish has an article in the NY Times regarding love and blogging. She discusses what it's like to KNOW what the object of affection is doing all the time, instead of merely wondering. I fell into (and have almost, but not quite crawled out of) that trap with Friendster, as that is how Mr. Maybe tracked me down and introduced himself to me. Despite my better judgment, I can't help but see who else he's contacting and getting to know in the same way he did with me. Reading Friendster profiles of the others, I too convinced myself that they were more attractive, more fun, and more interesting than I. What hurts most, I think, is how that revises history. It makes me think that when I did know him, I wasn't who he thought I was, he wasn't who I thought he was, and whatever we were, it wasn't real and it wasn't a really good thing. I actually tried to send him a text message last night on my way home from a party, because I heard on the radio that ODB died yesterday, and thought of him and his "free ODB" shirt. When I tried to send the message, I realized that he was no longer in my phone.
The party last night certainly defied my expectations. Whenever I attend a gathering of old friends, especially a gathering including these crazy characters, there's no telling what antics will have to be endured. I ended up enjoying myself much more than I had expected, and being in the company of these individuals got my mind whirring again. It had me thinking the entire way home, about many different things. All I'll say here is that it's interesting to reconnect to people you've known for years and realize that the type of people that you want to meet and hang out with have been around all along.
One friend mentioned to me that I'm so vague in my weblog, he thinks he's expected to know, for instance, where I'm living and what I'm doing right now. I didn't realize that I had done such a good job at being anonymous that even my own friends couldn't track me down. I suppose I could be less vigilant about revealing my geography. I'm just afraid that it makes it too easy for people with whom I associate professionally to identify me.
I have an interview tomorrow. I should go prepare.