Disregard the "I can do good things at my job" because today came back and slapped me in the face on that one.
and by "uncertainty" I mean, he stopped calling.
so that's that.
I did what any other healthy human being would do, and started drinking at lunchtime, and just stopped about an hour ago when I suddenly decided, out of the blue, that it was time for me to go home and cry. Instead, I came home and blogged. But the crying will probably come later. Because I TOLD YOU SO - it hurts to unravel it all later. There is probably a very good reason for the silence, but I won't be able to forget, next time (if) I hear from him, how it felt when I didn't. And then we get to start from the beginning, where I'll keep him at arm's length until he tricks me into thinking that it might be ok to let go.