2007 really will be different. Now the OC's been cancelled? What's happening to my 'social' life? Next you're gonna tell me that American Idol and So You Think You Can Dance are no longer. [Actually, my favorite new show of all time is My Boys on TBS. I was at a holiday party, discussing the Red Sox's decision to pay $51 mill just to negotiate with Matsuzaka with some friends. A friend interrupted and said, You know who you remind me of? That girl in My Boys. So I started watching it and WHOA. Way hooked. It rocks.]
As for my own life... When did I become so passive? So timid? So afraid? So risk-averse?
I've always been strong, forward-looking, assertive, and goal-oriented. This is just such a weird stage, where I'm stuck between where I once was and where I want to be. And where I want to be - is not where I want to be YET. I want to be married, with kids, and a yard, and pets... I guess that's what's NEXT. But that's not like getting a degree or entering the workforce. It's not like I can just send out resumes or starting taking the GREs for that. Besides, I want to travel and party and grow as a person before that next step.
I'm in the job that I want, but not exactly where I want to be personally, and it's hard to figure out how to change that. I've joined social organizations, I've volunteered, nothing's really sticking. Maybe there's nothing to be done, other than accepting the slower pace and having faith that these things will develop.
So, I never hid in my bed, despite the overwhelming desire to do so. And despite the job uncertainty right now (am I staying or going?) my job is what keeps me grounded, and focused, and motivated. Being back at work is good for my spirit. I'm working, I'm going to the gym, I'm happy. For today.
I'm also happy that the Pats are gonna wallop the Jets on Sunday. Look for me - I'll be the rowdy girl with the pitcher of Bud Light and buffalo sauce on her face.