Wednesday, November 23, 2005
Man, this job thing is rough. Yesterday was not such a good day. The judge was in a bad mood, which put the court staff in a bad mood, which made everyone else edgy. I had some good cases, then took on a case that I shouldn't have. I had to talk to several attorneys about it, one who gave me a thorough tongue-lashing, and I could feel my face turning red and tears coming to my eyes. My supervisor is not going to be pleased when it comes this case comes to light, and rightfully so. I'm dreading it. I feel like a scolded puppy so I'm trying to lay low and stay quiet for now. I was so stressed when I got home last night that inevitably, the thoughts of "Maybe I should have been a librarian" crossed my mind. I've been sick for two weeks, and I get healthy for about a day and then get sicker the next... and today is one of the less healthy days. Whew. Well, at least it's only a 3 day week. Nothing's been done that can't be undone, and no one's the worse for it. Except perhaps my ego.
I'm really looking forward to a long weekend of home, warmth, and turkey.
Have a wonderful Thanksgiving!
Posted by WomanoftheLaw at 11:10 AM
Tuesday, November 22, 2005
Friday, November 18, 2005
Now that I'm living in a city with public transportation, the cost-benefit analysis of keeping my car suggests that it's time to put Lilith down. So on Monday, she's being donated to Cars for Kids. She wasn't going to pass inspection again given the ever-growing crack in the windshield, she gets bad gas mileage because of the problem with the oxygen sensor, she has profanities keyed into her backside, she needs new tires soon, she freezes shut every winter, and she's 50,000 miles past her life expectancy. Nevertheless, she hasn't broken down since June 2003, when she broke down twice in two days leaving me stranded and causing me to miss a bridal shower. We didn't break up then, and over our time together since October 2000, we've shared many memories. Lilith drove around my kiddos when I was a social worker - I still have some toys crammed in the backseat cushions. I still have sidewalk chalk that I used with the cognitively limited boy I worked with my senior year of college. Lilith drove me to law school. Lilith hung out at the beach with me. She moved me to my favorite city last summer for my internship, she moved me to another favorite city last fall for another internship, she moved me to my new city now for my real job. She drove me back and forth the 40 minutes to work at the correctional facility last summer, with no A/C in the scorching heat and humidity. She drove me back home for the holidays. She drove me to the gym every morning at 5:45 a.m. in the darkness of the freezing winter mornings (despite her strenuous efforts to freeze closed). She can definitely outdrink you, at least in regards to engine coolant. She puts back a few gallons of that in no time.
She let me roll down her windows (which strangely, rolled in the opposite direction of any other car windows known to man) and let me crank up the radio (which no longer has essential buttons, like the 'scan down' button) and cruise (reluctantly and only at moderate speeds) along winding roads. With her, I was able to escape every time I needed to, and it's remarkable how she managed to (almost) always get me where I needed to be in my life.
I'm going to miss you, old girl. Thanks for the memories.
Posted by WomanoftheLaw at 12:00 PM
Wednesday, November 16, 2005
So I recently had my first experience interviewing clients, putting my appearance on the records, taking pleas, etc. It was exciting. I like interviewing clients, meeting with them, talking about what they're all about and what happened to them. Getting the court lingo down is a whole different story. At this point, it's a pretty steep learning curve. What I'm discovering is that I have a fundamental gap between figuring out how things are done and figuring out why things are done that way. It's easy enough to get up and just do what an experienced lawyer tells you to do. What I want to know is WHY I'm saying what I'm saying, and what the other possible options could be. Today I hit a breaking point when one attorney flew by on his way up to the podium and told me to get up and do XYZ. I was startled, a bit caught off guard, and the judge started addressing that attorney on the matter so I never got the chance to speak, which was fine by me. He later said, "You're going to have to do it. Don't be afraid, it won't bite." I was riled because I'm certainly not afraid to get up in front of a judge. I have always been arrogant enough to think that I know best, and now is no different. I'm ready to take on the system, I think I'll be THE badass who gets the system in line, and I couldn't even tell you how it was amiss, since I'm brand new. So I'm not afraid of judges. But I'm sure as hell terrified to get up and say something if I don't know why I'm saying it, and why I'm saying that as opposed to something else, and what the consequences of my words will be. I understand I should get up and say XYZ in ABC type cases. But why? What does an ABC case really entail? How does the XYZ resolve that issue?
My experience varies from attorney to attorney, so I can't impute my experience to all attorneys in my office. I think I finally realized today why some of my days are not so productive - because even though I might be saying and doing things, I'm still not exactly sure why.
How are you?
Posted by WomanoftheLaw at 5:15 PM